hetalia | There’s a Reason for Everything, but a Zombie Apocalypse …

Title: There’s a Reason for Everything, but a Zombie Apocalypse …
Rating: PG-13ish (for now)
Characters: England, France, America, Japan, Canada, Prussia, Netherlands, Italy, Germany, Spain, Romano, Russia, China, Poland, Lithuania, Norway, Iceland, Denmark, Sweden, Finland, Korea, Hong Kong, Switzerland, Austria, Hungry, pretty much the whole ensemble will appear at point or another
Pairings: FrUK, Ameripan, GerIta, RuCho, LietPol, AusHun, SuFin, DeNor,
Canada x Netherlands x Prussia, Korea x Iceland, Switzerland x Hong Kong, and numerous side parings
Warnings: AU, Stupidity, Human names used
Genre: attempted horror, humor, romance, and crack.
Summary: There was this one night, where my brother’s were drunk and decided to become psychiatrists. At least the only advice they gave the entire night was “Everything happens for a reason”. Well, that or “Not to do anything or else or our donkey will be charged with high treason”, but let’s focus on the first one, yeah? Since it was actually good advice. It did stick in my head. Everything happens for a reason. Like Alfred, I don’t know why he happened, but it was for a reason. Then I realized, just because things happen for a reason (like Alfred), doesn’t mean it’s a good reason (like Alfred). For example, how about a zombie apocalypse? What the hell kind of a good-shit reason is there to have one of those? What messed up fucker caused this to happen? Probably Alfred.
Notes: Nils - Norway, Matthias – Denmark, Leon – Hong Kong, Morgens – Netherlands, Emil – Iceland, Anneliese - Liechtenstein (full AN at the end)

Disclaimer: I think we all know the answer =.=

Chapter 1: A Reason.

Arthur’s POV
~
There was this one night, where my brother’s were drunk and decided to become psychiatrists. At least the only advice they gave the entire night was “Everything happens for a reason”. Well, that or “Not to do anything or else or our donkey will be charged with high treason”, but let’s focus on the first one, yeah? Since it was actually good advice. It did stick in my head. Everything happens for a reason. Like Alfred, I don’t know why he happened, but it was for a reason. Then I realized, just because things happen for a reason (like Alfred), doesn’t mean it’s a good reason (like Alfred). For example, how about a zombie apocalypse? What the hell kind of a good-shit reason is there to have one of those? What messed up fucker caused this to happen? Probably Alfred.

But before we get into all that, let’s start at the beginning. Beginning being 5 hours ago, not at the beginning of time, that’d be too fucking long to explain, that or Twilight.

5 Hours Earlier...

It started out as any other day in the small generic city of Hetamorte. Yeah, by the way, the founders were high as shit when they named this town. It was too late to change it by the time they sobered up, but that’s a story for another day.

The sun was shining, the birds were singing (trying to), the sky was blue, people were getting stoned, drunk, or streaking down the campus of Sirckle University. Yes, Sirckle with an S…and a K. I mentioned the founders were high as shit, right? They named everything, even the fire hydrant down the street. I rather not talk about the name of it. It makes me uncomfortable.

Once again, I digress. It pretty much all started in the dorms. Or at least that’s where our story starts…

NORMAL POV
~
Arthur woke up to the usual sight of Francis in his daily attire (or lack there of) and the sound of chaos radiating through the halls of the dorms. Yes, this was quite normal.

Arthur yawned and stretched before lazily shaking off his bed sheets, throwing Francis out of the room, and getting dressed. After he was clothed he walked out of his room to make his way down to the cafeteria. He planned on getting his hands on his premade deadly scones.

As he exited his room, he was immediately greeted by the sight of a temperamental Italian trying to kill his brother’s German boyfriend.

“Go to hell you German Potato Bastard!” Lovino yelled, “Antonio let me go, God damn it! Let me kill him! He tainted my brother!”

“But Lovi-”, Antonio said while being head butted by the struggling Italian, “It’s not nice to kill people, and I don’t think Ludwig did anything to Feli.”

“Like hell he didn’t!” replied Lovino.

Ludwig simply sighed at Lovino’s daily antics.

Feliciano came out of his hiding place behind Ludwig and stuttered, “Antonio’s right Lovi, Ludwig didn’t do anything. I mean sure he has those magazines under his bed but he hasn’t acted them out yet.”

To this Ludwig blushed before Lovino’s already bright red face turned 10 shades darker then the tomatoes he loved dearly. At that moment Roderick decided to exit the room he shared with the two Italian brothers and the blushing German with his girlfriend Elizabeta.

Roderick simply sighed at the commotion before saying to Arthur, “Try living with them.”

Elizabeta looked at Roderick and said, “ Come on, it’s not all bad. I mean, you always get to see them have se-”

Roderick covered her mouth before she could finish that sentence and dragged her away from the scene.

Arthur turned back to Antonio to find Lovino not being restrained anymore and now attempting to attack the much larger German. Wanting to avoid being a witness in a potential blood bath at a murder trial, he quickly walked away from the scene.

Making his way to the cafeteria he was soon interrupted again by his American half brother tackling him to the ground.

“Hey! Oh my gosh! How are you? It’s been so long! Have you tried the new burgers they have a McDonalds? There’s a movie marathon tonight in the main lounge. Wanna go? Wanna go? Huh? Wanna? Wanna? Wanna?” Alfred said in rapid succession.

A few seconds later, a frazzled Kiku, a cheerful Im Young Soo, and a particularly innocent Leon walked into the hallway. Kiku and Arthur quickly looked between the hyper American and Leon before both saying, “What did you do, Leon?”
Leon gave them a small smirk on his usually stoic face as Im Young Soo began to lose interest in the scene and started listening to his iPod.

“I may or may not have slipped him Energy shots and a Red Bull into his Coke.” Leon said.

An annoyed Arthur, still pinned to the ground, glared at Leon with all his might. He tried to look as threatening as possible while Alfred was still on top of him, but Leon just smiled ‘innocently’.

Kiku sighed and shrugged his shoulders, “At least it wasn’t explosives or alcohol this time”, he said, momentarily shuddering at the memory.

Im Young Soo then chose that time to start singing and dancing across the halls to his K-Pop music.

♫ ♪ Noonan nomu yehpuh, Geu geunyuhreul boneun naneun, michyuh, Ha hajiman ijehn jichyuh, Replay, replay, replay~♫ ♪

Kiku and Arthur both took their eyes off of Leon and Alfred and began on focusing on the hyperactive Korean.

They then turned back to Leon who merely stared blankly and said, “I had nothing to do with him.”

Sensing Arthurs temper boiling over, Kiku and Leon quickly dragged Alfred off of Arthur, grabbed a still musical Im Young Soo, and quickly ran back into the closest room. As Arthur began to walk away he heard a faint yelling of Im Young Soo exclaiming “Big brother’s breasts are mine!” and most likely tackling Kiku.

Arthur walked a few feet more before hearing the sounds of arguing Scandinavians from another room. After a second of different voices tossed around in various languages the door busted open to reveal a tall Swede and a Dane, quickly followed by an annoyed Norwegian, a panicked Finn, and an embarrassed Icelander. The argument between Berwald and Matthias continued as Tino tried to break it up.

“Come on guys, behave!” Tino said exasperatedly. “Be nice, we’re all friends here after all. Can we just live in peace for once?”

His pleas were ignored as the arguing continued.

Nils turned to Tino and said, “You’re doing it wrong.” and then proceeded to grab Matthias’s collar nearly strangling the larger boy in the process. The noise rose as now Tino’s flustered emotion turned to panic, Emil looked as if he wanted nothing more to disappear into the wall behind him , Berwald looked slightly amused (or at least Arthur thinks, it’s kind of hard to tell with Berwald’s perpetual stoicism) , at Nils and Matthias’s arguing. Just then Vash kicked open the door across the hall and pulled out his gun he has been polishing and shot the wall beside them six times barely missing everyone’s face.

“BE QUIET!” Vash yelled, “Anneliese sleeping!”

All the shouts were then immediately silenced. All of them, including Arthur, simultaneously looked at Vash with shocked faces. Vash huffed and slammed the door shut behind him. The Nordics then noticed Arthur and sheepishly walked away. Arthur growled to himself and yelled aloud, “Why does it have to take thirty bloody minutes just to walk down a thirty foot hallway?!”

He then saw Vash open the door again with his gun in response to his yelling, Arthur took that moment as a cue to run off.

After the incident with Vash, Arthur finally made it to the cafeteria in record time. He joined the (non existent) breakfast line, excited to finally get some scones, but was immediately greeted with the smell of chocolate and marijuana. He looked beyond the cash register, to catch a glimpse of his other half brother Matthew, Morgens, and Gilbert making brownies with a mysterious herb sprinkled on top. He sighed at their actions and grabbed his scones and sat down at a table…farthest away from them as possible.

He was about to take a bite of his scone in the abnormal peace and quiet, when Francis , butt naked with only a rose covering his nether regions, burst into the cafeteria, and the rest of his flat mates causing more commotion. Arthur was about to throw his scone angrily at the French man when a panicked Yao, a disturbingly peaceful and bloody Ivan, an even more panicked Toris, and a very confused and annoyed Feliks running into the cafeteria.

Arthur caught their attention with his waving hands and asked them, “What’s the matter? Weren’t you guys supposed to be in town shopping for food?”

Toris looked at him scared and managed to stutter out, “Z-z-zombies!”

To this exclamation my Toris everyone in the cafeteria silenced and gave the group a questioning look.

Lovino then broke the silence and asked, “Are you guys fucking high or something? I thought that was Matthew, Morgens, and Gilbert’s job?”

“Hey! Shut up!” one of the aforementioned trio called from the kitchen.

“No seriously! There’s like totally zombies outside!” Feliks exclaimed. He pointed to his shoes and said, “Like, just look at my heels, these are like six hundred dollar designer shoes! Do you really think I would run through blood and dirt for no reason?”

The college students looked at his shoes to see indeed they were covered in dirt and blood and indeed they were designer.

“And see, even Ivan is covered in blood.” Yao said, pointing at the large Russian.

A random student called out, “And that’s not normal how?”

Toris and Yao finally at their wits end, shouted, “Just look out the window!”

All the students crammed around the small section of windows and saw there was in fact a crowd of sick looking reanimated corpses wandering around the grounds. Students began to panic and scream, or in Alfred, Im Young Soo and Matthias’s case, got overly excited by the fact the Zombie Apocalypse was actually happening.

Arthur dropped his scone and everyone at that point realized that serious shit was about to go down.

A/N:

zombie: uhh… yeah… so this is the first fic that Sora and I wrote together (and my first fic overall) all suckyness is my fault

Sora: Sooo~ hopefully you all like it ^^ We worked very hard together and actual blood and tears were spilt (don’t ask :P). Over all if you made it this far thank you for taking your time and reading this!! Please leave comments/critiques/questions/and emoticons XD

P.S. Sora loves emoticons…see => <(o^_^o)> Also the song that Korea was singing is called "Replay (Noona is so pretty) by SHINee.

P.S.S. zombie wants sora to shut up now

P.S.S.S. :(