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hetalia2011-09-19 07:26 pm
starrdust411.livejournal.com) wrote in hetalia2011-09-19 07:26 pm
Entry tags:
[Fic] Sunday Dinner (2/3)
Title: Sunday Dinner (2/3)
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
starrdust411
Characters/Pairing: PruCan, FrUK
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Human AU, Gender Bending, Humor, Fluff
Summary: Nothing could go wrong when your over protective father invites your boyfriend over for dinner. Right? (Sequel to Little Girls)
Friday
Saturday
Maddie had to admit that she was a bit startled that she had been able to function at all that day given the night she had. Listening in on her parents' conversation had only served to shake her up even more and as a result she found herself tossing and turning for most of the night and into the early hours of the morning, wondering and dreading exactly what it was that Maman had planned. Yet when the afternoon came and all had continued to be quiet, Maddie had thought for certain that her concerns were unfounded.
That was until Maman began to insist that Dad go to the store and pick up a few things for tomorrow night.
"You don't need all of this do you?"
Maddie lifted her head, pulling her attention away from the task of clearing the kitchen table of their afternoon meal just long enough to take in the frown forming on her father's brow as his eyes scanned the impressive grocery list that Maman had handed him. His eyes widened when he flipped over the piece of paper to see that there was indeed more on the other side. "Dear God woman! This is going to take me hours to get."
"But, mon cher, we're having company tomorrow," Maman reminded him. "If I am going to be at my culinary best then I will need the right supplies."
"We're severing dinner to a teenage boy! Not the bloody Pope!"
"Here's my grocery list Daddy!" Abby put in as she handed him a scrap of paper that had been folded into a tiny square.
"Abigail, how many times do I have to tell you that you don't get your own personal grocery list," he chided, yet accepted the list none the less. His green eyes widened in confusion as he took in Abby's scribbled words. "What is this? 'Hot dogs, ice cream, Doritos, Funyuns, Go-Gurt...' What in God's name is 'Go-Gurt'?"
"Uh, it's yogurt you drink on the go, duh!"
"Huh," he hummed, concern creeping into his voice. "And 'Funyuns?'"
"They're fun onions."
"Abigail, there is no way I am getting you all of this junk."
"That's not fair! You're getting Mom all of her fancy Frenchy food."
Dad's face turned three shades of red as he sputtered and fumbled to explain himself. Fortunately for him, Maman calmly grabbed Abby's grocery list from his hands, deciding to handle the situation for once. "I shall take care of this," Maman declared. She then proceeded to rip the paper clean down the middle before turning her attention to Abby. "Now, Abigail, you can choose one side and one side only to give to your father. Which will it be?"
Abby pouted, her sad blue eyes flickering between each half before settling on the one she desired most. "Here Daddy," she whispered, handing him the top portion. "I want 'Strawberry Kiwi Kick' Go-Gurt."
"Fine dearest," he relented, patting Abby's hair and kissing her cheek. "Well, Madeleine, since I'm adhering to your mother and sister's ridiculous requests, is there anything that you might want from the store?"
Maddie flushed, finding her eyes suddenly drifting downward at the question. After last night's bit of snooping, Maddie suddenly found herself far too embarrassed to muster up the courage to look her father in the eye. She knew it was silly, but that didn't stop her face from burning red and her eyes from averting his whenever he spoke. "Um, no. I'm fine," she whispered, before realization dawned on her. "Well, actually, if you don't mind picking up-"
"A bottle of maple syrup?" he guessed correctly and Maddie could practically hear the smile in his words. "Of course, princess. Anything for you."
Her blush deepened as he crossed the room to place a loving kiss to her forehead. "Thank you, Daddy," she murmured just as he pulled away. Her heart was hammering so loudly that she barely heard him call out a final goodbye before heading out the door.
Maman stood for a few minutes as if waiting to see that he was actually gone before she let out a long sigh. "Well, that should keep him occupied for the rest of the day," she said to herself. "Alright girls, have a seat. I want to talk to you."
Abby and Maddie shared brief, twin looks of concern as Maman pulled out a chair at the kitchen table and motioned for them to do the same. They all sat down, deciding it would be fine to allow the last traces of lunch to sit on the table for a bit longer as they prepared themselves for what was to come next.
"What's up, Maman?" Abby asked. "Are we in trouble?"
"Of course not," Maman laughed. "Can't a mother just have a talk with her daughters without arousing suspicion?" Once again Abby and Maddie looked to each other, this time knowing that something horrible was waiting for them just around the corner.
This is it, Maddie thought, steeling herself for what was to come next.
Maman cleared her throat and leaned forward, a far too pleased look on her face as she pinned her eyes on each daughter in turn. "I wanted to talk to you two about sex."
The single word was enough to send a horrified shudder rippling through Maddie's body. If her face had been flushed before then it was absolutely cherry red now. She should have seen this coming. In fact, she had seen it coming. From the moment that her parents had discovered that she had a boyfriend Maddie knew that sooner or later both would attempt to have a sex talk with them. There was no doubt in her mind that this was exactly what Maman had meant when she had told Dad she would take care of things. Maddie felt like kicking herself for not finding some way out of this situation sooner (or at least giving Abby a warning like a good sister should).
"Gross Mom! No way!" Abby cringed, shaking her head in disgust as she abruptly pulled away from the table.
"Thanks Maman, but I don't think that'll be necessary," Maddie put in quickly as she followed her sister's lead. It was a long shot, but she hoped that fortune would smile on them and allow the twins to avoid this horrifying (and potentially scaring) conversation.
"Not so fast!" Maman chided. "You two will sit and listen to what your Maman has to say."
"Aw, come on Maman!" Abby whined, desperation coloring her every word. "Maddie and I already know all about the birds and the bees. We don't have to talk about this!"
Maman frowned, shaking her head and letting out an exasperated huff. "You two may be aware of the basics, but that does not mean you have learned everything there is to know about sex. Now sit. Both of you! Sit sit!"
With a pout and a terrified groan from each twin, the two -- reluctantly -- returned to their chairs, cringing and shuddering in anticipation. "Way to go Maddie," Abby grumbled. "You and your stupid boyfriend are totally ruining my life."
"Do not blame your sister, Abigail," Maman scolded lightly. "You are both long overdue for this talk. After all, I was much younger than you two when I lost my virginity." A wistful sigh escaped her lips as a dreamy gleam settled onto her soft features. "Ah, I remember it all like it was just yesterday. I was fourteen years old and dating this handsome young man..."
It was at that moment that Maddie willed herself to escape to her happy place, a world not unlike Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, but instead of chocolate rivers and gumdrop trees, there was a waterfall of maple syrup and mountains of pancakes surrounded by bushes that flowered poutine. She stayed in her fantasy land, guzzling fists full's of syrup and shoveling gravy coated french fries into her mouth until she felt that it was safe to come back to the real world.
"... which was nothing compared to some of the things your father and I do in bed. Truth be told, your father may not look like much, but the things he does with his-"
"Mom!" Abby practically screamed the word, putting a firm end to what could have been the most emotionally scaring and horrific sentence ever uttered by their mother. "Sorry to interrupt your grossly inappropriate tangent, but could you please tell us what the heck any of this has to do with anything?"
"Oh. Of course." Maman tittered, waving a dismissive hand as she slowly floated back down to reality. "I suppose you girls are a bit young to know about all the things your father can do with his tongue --" Those mental images would take years to seep out of her mind. "-- or how long he can hold his breath --" Maple! "-- but that is not the point. The point is that sex is never as good as when you are in love with the person you're being intimate with. I have been with many men (many women as well) and none of them have made me feel the way your father does.
"Sex is wonderful, and fun, but love... Love is the most beautiful, magnificent thing in the world and when you share yourself with someone you love, it makes everything infinitely better." Maman's smile widened as she turned her violet eyes towards Maddie. "Madeleine, are you and your beau-"
"No Maman!" she said quickly, her face turning the color of a tomato at the mere suggestion. Her heart was beating a mile a second inside her chest as sweat poured down her burning cheeks. Once again, she should have seen this coming, but... "N-no. No no no. No. No of course not. No. No way. No. No, we... no."
Maman chuckled, reaching under the table to grasp Maddie's trembling hand in her own. "Oh, Madeleine, there is no need for you to be so nervous," she laughed. "Remember, this is me you're talking to. Not your father!"
Maddie felt her heart quiver and die at the thought of having this very conversation with her father. Yet at the same time, she had to wonder if this were any better. "I know Maman," she said, her voice little more than a whisper. "But... well, I'm... we're... we haven't done anything."
"But you want to." It wasn't a question, yet Maddie still took the time to answer with a nervous nod. "You love him." Again, there was nothing short of certainty to her mother's words, but this time Maddie felt the need to vocalize her response.
"Yes," she admitted. "I do."
Looking up through her lashes, Maddie watched as a hundred different emotions settled and blended onto her mother's face. She looked proud, tender, loving, and wistful all at once as she gave Maddie's hand a supportive squeeze. "I think it is time I took you two to see a very special doctor."
---
Maddie had hoped that things would settle down for the rest of the day after the awkward events of that afternoon, but her luck seemed to have run out some time ago as things only continued to spiral downhill from there.
Dad had come home in the middle of the evening and when Maman saw just how many groceries would need to be unpacked and put away, she decided to simply order a pizza instead of preparing dinner. It was somewhere between calling for delivery and sorting through the food that Maman let it slip that she had had a "special talk" with them that afternoon, which resulted in one of their infamous Kirkland-Bonnefoy fights. Having learned very early on to stay as far away as possible when things got heated between their parents, the girls managed to retreat upstairs (Maddie with a bottle of syrup and Abby carrying two packs of Go-Gurt between her teeth) undetected, deciding not to return until dinner was ready.
What resulted was a flood of screams, cabinet banging, and wall shaking -- the basic signs of an argument between the two. Yet as a surprising twist, by the time the pizza had arrived, things had settled down quite a bit.
"They wrapped it all up in only thirty minutes?" Abby had commented as the two descended the stairs together. "Wow that must be some sort of record."
Maddie wasn't nearly as impressed. A sense of caution had filled her all throughout dinner. Even though Dad and Maman were speaking to each other in a civilized tone and even making eye contact every once in a while, there still seemed to be too much tension hanging in the air to breath easily. The source of this discomfort only revealed itself after the table had been cleared and the last dish put away.
"Come into the living room girls," Dad said as soon as everything had been put in order. "I'd like to have a word with you."
"Okay. Can I get a snack first?"
"Abigail, you just finished eating dinner."
"That's why it's the perfect time for ice cream!"
Dad shook his head before heading into the living room, not bothering to wait for the girls to follow.
"Maman, what's Daddy going to talk to us about?" Maddie asked, praying that it wasn't at all what she was thinking.
Maman frowned in displeasure as if the innocent question was somehow offensive to her. "I am not supposed to say anything," she said, tight lipped and bitter.
The cold feeling that spread into her stomach was painfully icy now as Maddie processed her mother's answer. Her very demeanor did not bode well at all. Something horrible was going to happen. "Maman, you have to tell me, what's Dad going to say? Is it really going to be that bad?"
"Come here Madeleine," Maman instructed, motioning for her to come closer. Maddie complied, taking a few nervous steps towards her mother. A slight shudder escaped her as Maman placed her soft hands on either side of her face. She watched as her mother's brow crinkled with concern. "Look at your skin!" she sighed. "You are so pale and blotchy, mon chou." She clucked her tongue, turning Maddie's face this way and that. "You are almost as pasty as your father."
"I heard that Francoise!" Dad called from somewhere in the living room.
"You were meant to, mon cher~"
"Enough playing around. Bring the girls in here!"
Maman heaved a dramatic sigh as she ushered the twins out of the kitchen (removing the pint of ice cream from Abby's hands) and into the family room. As they entered the room, Maddie saw that Dad wasn't seated, but standing, arms crossed over his chest and a stern expression on his face. Maddie swallowed back the whimper building in her throat, suddenly all too certain where this was heading.
"Have a seat girls," he instructed, and they did, Abby lounging comfortably on one end of the couch and Maddie sitting stiffly on the other. Dad then proceeded to sigh, clear his throat, and then sigh again, his eyes filled with reluctance and concern as he likely considered how to start what would no doubt be an incredibly uncomfortable discussion. "Now girls, I understand that your Mother had a... 'special' conversation with you this afternoon and, well, I just wanted to put my two cents in."
"Oh geez, is this another sex talk?" Abby whined, finally tuning in to what was going on. "I mean, oh my God you guys. Seriously? Maddie's the one with the boyfriend, so why do I have to be tortured? Seriously!"
"Abigail this is not torture," Dad chided. "A parent having a conversation with his children is not a punishment. Now you will sit quietly and pay attention, young lady, or there'll be no dessert for you tonight."
"Not even Go-Gurt?"
Maman entered the living room then, gently setting herself down between the two sisters as she pulled Abby's head on to her shoulder, stroking her short blonde hair soothingly. "There there," she crooned. "You are lucky that I managed to talk your father out of showing you a slide show of potential STDs."
"Francoise, get out of here. You're being distracting."
Maman huffed, rubbing Abby's arm in a gesture that was at once comforting and defiant. "I think that I have a right to hear what you are going to say to my daughters."
"I'm going to tell the girls what you should have told them: that sex is dangerous and scary!"
"But Daddy, sex is how babies are made," Abby teased. "Babies aren't scary!"
Dad groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose and muttering something under his breath. "Yes, Abby, that is how babies are made," he muttered with a sigh, "but at your age having a baby is a very bad thing. Babies aren't just cute little play things, they're tiny people who depend on you every second of everyday, and if one of you two were to have a baby now it could get in the way of your having a career or going off to university or even finishing high school."
"Meh, I'm not gonna have a kid anytime soon anyway," Abby shrugged. "I'm gonna wait until I'm really old, like thirty or something, and then I'm gonna have a whole bunch of kids. And then we're gonna start a band and-"
"Abigail, remember what I said earlier about being quiet or no dessert?"
Abby didn't so much make a peep in response, choosing instead to merely bury herself deeper into Maman's embrace, who in turn rewarded the gesture with a soothing pat. Satisfied with the new found silence from his audience, Dad cleared his throat and continued.
"I hope you girls understand what I'm trying to say," he went on. "Sex may seem exciting and new, but there are consequences. Even if you don't get pregnant you may get sick. There are a lot of diseases out there that you can contract that don't go away. Some of them may even kill you. In fact, they all can kill you."
"Arthur!" Maman chided. "That is not true!"
A slight flush crept onto Dad's cheeks, but he managed to cover it up with a forced cough. "Well, fine, they won't all kill you."
"The important thing to remember, girls," Maman began sagely, placing a hand on each twin, "is to use protection and wait until you're ready."
"Don't tell them that!" Dad cut in. "They shouldn't have sex until they're married."
"Oh Arthur, you are such a caveman! Do you really think these two beautiful girls are going to wait all the way until they are married?"
"If they respect themselves they will."
"Ah yes, because I was just the town whore before you married me."
"This isn't about you, Francoise!"
"You were implying!"
The twins groaned as they listened to their parents continue to throw insults and accusations back and forth between each other. When it became clear that tonight's discussion had come to an untimely end, the two managed to make their escape, retreating upstairs while Maman and Dad were still focused on each other.
---
Somewhere between the dinner and the chaos of the failed sex talk, Gilbert had called her -- several times in fact -- and since Maddie's cell phone had unfortunately been silenced most of the evening, she hadn't been aware of any of his calls until well after she had showered and settled in for the night. She had only decided to look at her phone as an afterthought between combing her hair and brushing her teeth. It was then that she was startled to find that Gilbert had eventually given up and texted her.
Gilbert didn't text, deeming the whole concept of writing messages with your thumb to be "lame," so a text from him was a rare sight indeed. There was a strange fluttery feeling in the middle of her chest at the idea that Gilbert had broken his own rule for her, but Maddie pushed the childish sensation aside. What time should I come over tomorrow? was his short, to the point message.
Maddie quickly sent him a response, hoping that it wasn't too late. 6pm. Please don't be late.
She waited a full minute and after receiving no response headed into the bathroom to complete her nightly routine. Seconds after returning to her room, Maddie's heart was a flutter once more as a familiar chime caught her ear: her phone was ringing. Checking the display screen, she was delighted to see Gilbert's name appear before her eyes, the sight sending goose bumps exploding across her skin. Mindful to close the door before answering, Maddie picked up with what she hoped was a very calm, casual "Hello?"
"Yeah, don't make me text," came Gilbert's response. "That's not cool."
"Sorry," she giggled, her voice a bit too nervous for her own liking. "I was, uh, kinda busy. My Dad, he... he wanted to have a talk with me and my sister."
"Oh." There was a pause and Maddie felt her stomach twist in response. She didn't like the sound of that "oh." It was definitely the type of "oh" someone gave when they were having second thoughts, when they felt trapped with a girl who wasn't pretty or interesting enough to be worth the time and effort that was being spent on her. It was certainly the sort of "oh" that ended relationships and sent young women into deep, spiraling depressions and Maddie felt her heart begin to crumble in anticipation. "Things are getting pretty crazy over there, huh?"
Maddie nodded, relieved that Gilbert's voice suddenly sounded more like its confident self. "Yeah, I guess."
"Well, don't worry. Tomorrow's gonna be fine. Your parents will see how awesome I am and they'll totally give us permission to date."
She sighed, cradling the phone in both her hands as she stared sadly at the calendar pinned to her wall. Her heart sank just a little bit as she gazed at the date that had been marked off and now gave off an air of utter dread. Sunday was still hours away, but it was already turning into the longest day of her life. "I wish I was as sure as you are."
The knock on the door was enough to send her jumping off of her bed, her phone nearly crashing to the floor in her shock. "Maddie?" Dad's voice came from the other side. "Maddie can I talk to you?"
"Just a second," she called, before quickly turning her attention back to her cell phone. "Gilbert, I have to go," she whispered. "My Dad doesn't like me talking on the phone so late."
"Yeesh your dad has a lot of rules," Gilbert grumbled. "Alright. What time am I coming over again?"
She groaned, her heart quickly sinking to her feet already. Somehow she knew tomorrow was going to be a total disaster. "Six o'clock," she told him again. "And please don't be late. And please be good."
"Don't worry, I'm always good," Gilbert boasted and suddenly Maddie wondered if he'd forgotten that he was still expelled from school. "See ya tomorrow."
As soon as they said their goodbyes, Maddie was quick to turn her phone off and put it away for fear that even the sight of it might make Dad suspicious. When it was hidden, she opened the door and greeted her father with what she hoped was a calm, innocent smile. "Yes Daddy?"
Dad smiled at her, before turning to give her bedroom a quick scan. "Getting ready for bed, princess?"
Maddie nodded.
"I thought I heard you speaking to someone," he commented. "You weren't on the phone, were you?"
"No Daddy," she lied, ashamed to do such a thing considering what she was already putting him through. "It's already off."
He nodded his approval as his eyes turned to focus only on her. "Before you go to bed, I wanted to talk to you," he explained. "I know that a lot of what I said downstairs sounded like I was trying to scare you and your sister, but I was only saying all that because it's true. There are a lot of consequences to sex and I don't want my girls getting hurt. Boys your age..." Dad's eyes turned soft, no doubt noticing the way Maddie flinched at his tone, shifting from foot to foot nervously. "I was young once," he told her. "I know how teenage boys think. They only want one thing from you and they don't much care what happens afterwards."
"Daddy I can't imagine you ever thinking that way," Maddie whispered leaving the obviously unspoken "or Gilbert" to her own thoughts. She couldn't imagine Gilbert being like that. If he only wanted to sleep with her then he would have brought it up by now, but he hadn't.
"I know it's hard to believe," he said, a self deprecating smirk on his face, "but I know firsthand all the dirty little thoughts that go through a young man's head and I don't want you to get hurt because some boy is pressuring you to do something you don't want to do." He gave a tired sigh before wrapping his arms around her, pulling Maddie close and resting his cheek against her hair. "I'm only saying this because I love and I want to protect you."
Maddie returned the hug as she nodded into his shoulder. "I know," she whispered. "And I love you too."
Sunday
Author:
starrdust411Characters/Pairing: PruCan, FrUK
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Human AU, Gender Bending, Humor, Fluff
Summary: Nothing could go wrong when your over protective father invites your boyfriend over for dinner. Right? (Sequel to Little Girls)
Friday
Saturday
Maddie had to admit that she was a bit startled that she had been able to function at all that day given the night she had. Listening in on her parents' conversation had only served to shake her up even more and as a result she found herself tossing and turning for most of the night and into the early hours of the morning, wondering and dreading exactly what it was that Maman had planned. Yet when the afternoon came and all had continued to be quiet, Maddie had thought for certain that her concerns were unfounded.
That was until Maman began to insist that Dad go to the store and pick up a few things for tomorrow night.
"You don't need all of this do you?"
Maddie lifted her head, pulling her attention away from the task of clearing the kitchen table of their afternoon meal just long enough to take in the frown forming on her father's brow as his eyes scanned the impressive grocery list that Maman had handed him. His eyes widened when he flipped over the piece of paper to see that there was indeed more on the other side. "Dear God woman! This is going to take me hours to get."
"But, mon cher, we're having company tomorrow," Maman reminded him. "If I am going to be at my culinary best then I will need the right supplies."
"We're severing dinner to a teenage boy! Not the bloody Pope!"
"Here's my grocery list Daddy!" Abby put in as she handed him a scrap of paper that had been folded into a tiny square.
"Abigail, how many times do I have to tell you that you don't get your own personal grocery list," he chided, yet accepted the list none the less. His green eyes widened in confusion as he took in Abby's scribbled words. "What is this? 'Hot dogs, ice cream, Doritos, Funyuns, Go-Gurt...' What in God's name is 'Go-Gurt'?"
"Uh, it's yogurt you drink on the go, duh!"
"Huh," he hummed, concern creeping into his voice. "And 'Funyuns?'"
"They're fun onions."
"Abigail, there is no way I am getting you all of this junk."
"That's not fair! You're getting Mom all of her fancy Frenchy food."
Dad's face turned three shades of red as he sputtered and fumbled to explain himself. Fortunately for him, Maman calmly grabbed Abby's grocery list from his hands, deciding to handle the situation for once. "I shall take care of this," Maman declared. She then proceeded to rip the paper clean down the middle before turning her attention to Abby. "Now, Abigail, you can choose one side and one side only to give to your father. Which will it be?"
Abby pouted, her sad blue eyes flickering between each half before settling on the one she desired most. "Here Daddy," she whispered, handing him the top portion. "I want 'Strawberry Kiwi Kick' Go-Gurt."
"Fine dearest," he relented, patting Abby's hair and kissing her cheek. "Well, Madeleine, since I'm adhering to your mother and sister's ridiculous requests, is there anything that you might want from the store?"
Maddie flushed, finding her eyes suddenly drifting downward at the question. After last night's bit of snooping, Maddie suddenly found herself far too embarrassed to muster up the courage to look her father in the eye. She knew it was silly, but that didn't stop her face from burning red and her eyes from averting his whenever he spoke. "Um, no. I'm fine," she whispered, before realization dawned on her. "Well, actually, if you don't mind picking up-"
"A bottle of maple syrup?" he guessed correctly and Maddie could practically hear the smile in his words. "Of course, princess. Anything for you."
Her blush deepened as he crossed the room to place a loving kiss to her forehead. "Thank you, Daddy," she murmured just as he pulled away. Her heart was hammering so loudly that she barely heard him call out a final goodbye before heading out the door.
Maman stood for a few minutes as if waiting to see that he was actually gone before she let out a long sigh. "Well, that should keep him occupied for the rest of the day," she said to herself. "Alright girls, have a seat. I want to talk to you."
Abby and Maddie shared brief, twin looks of concern as Maman pulled out a chair at the kitchen table and motioned for them to do the same. They all sat down, deciding it would be fine to allow the last traces of lunch to sit on the table for a bit longer as they prepared themselves for what was to come next.
"What's up, Maman?" Abby asked. "Are we in trouble?"
"Of course not," Maman laughed. "Can't a mother just have a talk with her daughters without arousing suspicion?" Once again Abby and Maddie looked to each other, this time knowing that something horrible was waiting for them just around the corner.
This is it, Maddie thought, steeling herself for what was to come next.
Maman cleared her throat and leaned forward, a far too pleased look on her face as she pinned her eyes on each daughter in turn. "I wanted to talk to you two about sex."
The single word was enough to send a horrified shudder rippling through Maddie's body. If her face had been flushed before then it was absolutely cherry red now. She should have seen this coming. In fact, she had seen it coming. From the moment that her parents had discovered that she had a boyfriend Maddie knew that sooner or later both would attempt to have a sex talk with them. There was no doubt in her mind that this was exactly what Maman had meant when she had told Dad she would take care of things. Maddie felt like kicking herself for not finding some way out of this situation sooner (or at least giving Abby a warning like a good sister should).
"Gross Mom! No way!" Abby cringed, shaking her head in disgust as she abruptly pulled away from the table.
"Thanks Maman, but I don't think that'll be necessary," Maddie put in quickly as she followed her sister's lead. It was a long shot, but she hoped that fortune would smile on them and allow the twins to avoid this horrifying (and potentially scaring) conversation.
"Not so fast!" Maman chided. "You two will sit and listen to what your Maman has to say."
"Aw, come on Maman!" Abby whined, desperation coloring her every word. "Maddie and I already know all about the birds and the bees. We don't have to talk about this!"
Maman frowned, shaking her head and letting out an exasperated huff. "You two may be aware of the basics, but that does not mean you have learned everything there is to know about sex. Now sit. Both of you! Sit sit!"
With a pout and a terrified groan from each twin, the two -- reluctantly -- returned to their chairs, cringing and shuddering in anticipation. "Way to go Maddie," Abby grumbled. "You and your stupid boyfriend are totally ruining my life."
"Do not blame your sister, Abigail," Maman scolded lightly. "You are both long overdue for this talk. After all, I was much younger than you two when I lost my virginity." A wistful sigh escaped her lips as a dreamy gleam settled onto her soft features. "Ah, I remember it all like it was just yesterday. I was fourteen years old and dating this handsome young man..."
It was at that moment that Maddie willed herself to escape to her happy place, a world not unlike Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, but instead of chocolate rivers and gumdrop trees, there was a waterfall of maple syrup and mountains of pancakes surrounded by bushes that flowered poutine. She stayed in her fantasy land, guzzling fists full's of syrup and shoveling gravy coated french fries into her mouth until she felt that it was safe to come back to the real world.
"... which was nothing compared to some of the things your father and I do in bed. Truth be told, your father may not look like much, but the things he does with his-"
"Mom!" Abby practically screamed the word, putting a firm end to what could have been the most emotionally scaring and horrific sentence ever uttered by their mother. "Sorry to interrupt your grossly inappropriate tangent, but could you please tell us what the heck any of this has to do with anything?"
"Oh. Of course." Maman tittered, waving a dismissive hand as she slowly floated back down to reality. "I suppose you girls are a bit young to know about all the things your father can do with his tongue --" Those mental images would take years to seep out of her mind. "-- or how long he can hold his breath --" Maple! "-- but that is not the point. The point is that sex is never as good as when you are in love with the person you're being intimate with. I have been with many men (many women as well) and none of them have made me feel the way your father does.
"Sex is wonderful, and fun, but love... Love is the most beautiful, magnificent thing in the world and when you share yourself with someone you love, it makes everything infinitely better." Maman's smile widened as she turned her violet eyes towards Maddie. "Madeleine, are you and your beau-"
"No Maman!" she said quickly, her face turning the color of a tomato at the mere suggestion. Her heart was beating a mile a second inside her chest as sweat poured down her burning cheeks. Once again, she should have seen this coming, but... "N-no. No no no. No. No of course not. No. No way. No. No, we... no."
Maman chuckled, reaching under the table to grasp Maddie's trembling hand in her own. "Oh, Madeleine, there is no need for you to be so nervous," she laughed. "Remember, this is me you're talking to. Not your father!"
Maddie felt her heart quiver and die at the thought of having this very conversation with her father. Yet at the same time, she had to wonder if this were any better. "I know Maman," she said, her voice little more than a whisper. "But... well, I'm... we're... we haven't done anything."
"But you want to." It wasn't a question, yet Maddie still took the time to answer with a nervous nod. "You love him." Again, there was nothing short of certainty to her mother's words, but this time Maddie felt the need to vocalize her response.
"Yes," she admitted. "I do."
Looking up through her lashes, Maddie watched as a hundred different emotions settled and blended onto her mother's face. She looked proud, tender, loving, and wistful all at once as she gave Maddie's hand a supportive squeeze. "I think it is time I took you two to see a very special doctor."
---
Maddie had hoped that things would settle down for the rest of the day after the awkward events of that afternoon, but her luck seemed to have run out some time ago as things only continued to spiral downhill from there.
Dad had come home in the middle of the evening and when Maman saw just how many groceries would need to be unpacked and put away, she decided to simply order a pizza instead of preparing dinner. It was somewhere between calling for delivery and sorting through the food that Maman let it slip that she had had a "special talk" with them that afternoon, which resulted in one of their infamous Kirkland-Bonnefoy fights. Having learned very early on to stay as far away as possible when things got heated between their parents, the girls managed to retreat upstairs (Maddie with a bottle of syrup and Abby carrying two packs of Go-Gurt between her teeth) undetected, deciding not to return until dinner was ready.
What resulted was a flood of screams, cabinet banging, and wall shaking -- the basic signs of an argument between the two. Yet as a surprising twist, by the time the pizza had arrived, things had settled down quite a bit.
"They wrapped it all up in only thirty minutes?" Abby had commented as the two descended the stairs together. "Wow that must be some sort of record."
Maddie wasn't nearly as impressed. A sense of caution had filled her all throughout dinner. Even though Dad and Maman were speaking to each other in a civilized tone and even making eye contact every once in a while, there still seemed to be too much tension hanging in the air to breath easily. The source of this discomfort only revealed itself after the table had been cleared and the last dish put away.
"Come into the living room girls," Dad said as soon as everything had been put in order. "I'd like to have a word with you."
"Okay. Can I get a snack first?"
"Abigail, you just finished eating dinner."
"That's why it's the perfect time for ice cream!"
Dad shook his head before heading into the living room, not bothering to wait for the girls to follow.
"Maman, what's Daddy going to talk to us about?" Maddie asked, praying that it wasn't at all what she was thinking.
Maman frowned in displeasure as if the innocent question was somehow offensive to her. "I am not supposed to say anything," she said, tight lipped and bitter.
The cold feeling that spread into her stomach was painfully icy now as Maddie processed her mother's answer. Her very demeanor did not bode well at all. Something horrible was going to happen. "Maman, you have to tell me, what's Dad going to say? Is it really going to be that bad?"
"Come here Madeleine," Maman instructed, motioning for her to come closer. Maddie complied, taking a few nervous steps towards her mother. A slight shudder escaped her as Maman placed her soft hands on either side of her face. She watched as her mother's brow crinkled with concern. "Look at your skin!" she sighed. "You are so pale and blotchy, mon chou." She clucked her tongue, turning Maddie's face this way and that. "You are almost as pasty as your father."
"I heard that Francoise!" Dad called from somewhere in the living room.
"You were meant to, mon cher~"
"Enough playing around. Bring the girls in here!"
Maman heaved a dramatic sigh as she ushered the twins out of the kitchen (removing the pint of ice cream from Abby's hands) and into the family room. As they entered the room, Maddie saw that Dad wasn't seated, but standing, arms crossed over his chest and a stern expression on his face. Maddie swallowed back the whimper building in her throat, suddenly all too certain where this was heading.
"Have a seat girls," he instructed, and they did, Abby lounging comfortably on one end of the couch and Maddie sitting stiffly on the other. Dad then proceeded to sigh, clear his throat, and then sigh again, his eyes filled with reluctance and concern as he likely considered how to start what would no doubt be an incredibly uncomfortable discussion. "Now girls, I understand that your Mother had a... 'special' conversation with you this afternoon and, well, I just wanted to put my two cents in."
"Oh geez, is this another sex talk?" Abby whined, finally tuning in to what was going on. "I mean, oh my God you guys. Seriously? Maddie's the one with the boyfriend, so why do I have to be tortured? Seriously!"
"Abigail this is not torture," Dad chided. "A parent having a conversation with his children is not a punishment. Now you will sit quietly and pay attention, young lady, or there'll be no dessert for you tonight."
"Not even Go-Gurt?"
Maman entered the living room then, gently setting herself down between the two sisters as she pulled Abby's head on to her shoulder, stroking her short blonde hair soothingly. "There there," she crooned. "You are lucky that I managed to talk your father out of showing you a slide show of potential STDs."
"Francoise, get out of here. You're being distracting."
Maman huffed, rubbing Abby's arm in a gesture that was at once comforting and defiant. "I think that I have a right to hear what you are going to say to my daughters."
"I'm going to tell the girls what you should have told them: that sex is dangerous and scary!"
"But Daddy, sex is how babies are made," Abby teased. "Babies aren't scary!"
Dad groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose and muttering something under his breath. "Yes, Abby, that is how babies are made," he muttered with a sigh, "but at your age having a baby is a very bad thing. Babies aren't just cute little play things, they're tiny people who depend on you every second of everyday, and if one of you two were to have a baby now it could get in the way of your having a career or going off to university or even finishing high school."
"Meh, I'm not gonna have a kid anytime soon anyway," Abby shrugged. "I'm gonna wait until I'm really old, like thirty or something, and then I'm gonna have a whole bunch of kids. And then we're gonna start a band and-"
"Abigail, remember what I said earlier about being quiet or no dessert?"
Abby didn't so much make a peep in response, choosing instead to merely bury herself deeper into Maman's embrace, who in turn rewarded the gesture with a soothing pat. Satisfied with the new found silence from his audience, Dad cleared his throat and continued.
"I hope you girls understand what I'm trying to say," he went on. "Sex may seem exciting and new, but there are consequences. Even if you don't get pregnant you may get sick. There are a lot of diseases out there that you can contract that don't go away. Some of them may even kill you. In fact, they all can kill you."
"Arthur!" Maman chided. "That is not true!"
A slight flush crept onto Dad's cheeks, but he managed to cover it up with a forced cough. "Well, fine, they won't all kill you."
"The important thing to remember, girls," Maman began sagely, placing a hand on each twin, "is to use protection and wait until you're ready."
"Don't tell them that!" Dad cut in. "They shouldn't have sex until they're married."
"Oh Arthur, you are such a caveman! Do you really think these two beautiful girls are going to wait all the way until they are married?"
"If they respect themselves they will."
"Ah yes, because I was just the town whore before you married me."
"This isn't about you, Francoise!"
"You were implying!"
The twins groaned as they listened to their parents continue to throw insults and accusations back and forth between each other. When it became clear that tonight's discussion had come to an untimely end, the two managed to make their escape, retreating upstairs while Maman and Dad were still focused on each other.
---
Somewhere between the dinner and the chaos of the failed sex talk, Gilbert had called her -- several times in fact -- and since Maddie's cell phone had unfortunately been silenced most of the evening, she hadn't been aware of any of his calls until well after she had showered and settled in for the night. She had only decided to look at her phone as an afterthought between combing her hair and brushing her teeth. It was then that she was startled to find that Gilbert had eventually given up and texted her.
Gilbert didn't text, deeming the whole concept of writing messages with your thumb to be "lame," so a text from him was a rare sight indeed. There was a strange fluttery feeling in the middle of her chest at the idea that Gilbert had broken his own rule for her, but Maddie pushed the childish sensation aside. What time should I come over tomorrow? was his short, to the point message.
Maddie quickly sent him a response, hoping that it wasn't too late. 6pm. Please don't be late.
She waited a full minute and after receiving no response headed into the bathroom to complete her nightly routine. Seconds after returning to her room, Maddie's heart was a flutter once more as a familiar chime caught her ear: her phone was ringing. Checking the display screen, she was delighted to see Gilbert's name appear before her eyes, the sight sending goose bumps exploding across her skin. Mindful to close the door before answering, Maddie picked up with what she hoped was a very calm, casual "Hello?"
"Yeah, don't make me text," came Gilbert's response. "That's not cool."
"Sorry," she giggled, her voice a bit too nervous for her own liking. "I was, uh, kinda busy. My Dad, he... he wanted to have a talk with me and my sister."
"Oh." There was a pause and Maddie felt her stomach twist in response. She didn't like the sound of that "oh." It was definitely the type of "oh" someone gave when they were having second thoughts, when they felt trapped with a girl who wasn't pretty or interesting enough to be worth the time and effort that was being spent on her. It was certainly the sort of "oh" that ended relationships and sent young women into deep, spiraling depressions and Maddie felt her heart begin to crumble in anticipation. "Things are getting pretty crazy over there, huh?"
Maddie nodded, relieved that Gilbert's voice suddenly sounded more like its confident self. "Yeah, I guess."
"Well, don't worry. Tomorrow's gonna be fine. Your parents will see how awesome I am and they'll totally give us permission to date."
She sighed, cradling the phone in both her hands as she stared sadly at the calendar pinned to her wall. Her heart sank just a little bit as she gazed at the date that had been marked off and now gave off an air of utter dread. Sunday was still hours away, but it was already turning into the longest day of her life. "I wish I was as sure as you are."
The knock on the door was enough to send her jumping off of her bed, her phone nearly crashing to the floor in her shock. "Maddie?" Dad's voice came from the other side. "Maddie can I talk to you?"
"Just a second," she called, before quickly turning her attention back to her cell phone. "Gilbert, I have to go," she whispered. "My Dad doesn't like me talking on the phone so late."
"Yeesh your dad has a lot of rules," Gilbert grumbled. "Alright. What time am I coming over again?"
She groaned, her heart quickly sinking to her feet already. Somehow she knew tomorrow was going to be a total disaster. "Six o'clock," she told him again. "And please don't be late. And please be good."
"Don't worry, I'm always good," Gilbert boasted and suddenly Maddie wondered if he'd forgotten that he was still expelled from school. "See ya tomorrow."
As soon as they said their goodbyes, Maddie was quick to turn her phone off and put it away for fear that even the sight of it might make Dad suspicious. When it was hidden, she opened the door and greeted her father with what she hoped was a calm, innocent smile. "Yes Daddy?"
Dad smiled at her, before turning to give her bedroom a quick scan. "Getting ready for bed, princess?"
Maddie nodded.
"I thought I heard you speaking to someone," he commented. "You weren't on the phone, were you?"
"No Daddy," she lied, ashamed to do such a thing considering what she was already putting him through. "It's already off."
He nodded his approval as his eyes turned to focus only on her. "Before you go to bed, I wanted to talk to you," he explained. "I know that a lot of what I said downstairs sounded like I was trying to scare you and your sister, but I was only saying all that because it's true. There are a lot of consequences to sex and I don't want my girls getting hurt. Boys your age..." Dad's eyes turned soft, no doubt noticing the way Maddie flinched at his tone, shifting from foot to foot nervously. "I was young once," he told her. "I know how teenage boys think. They only want one thing from you and they don't much care what happens afterwards."
"Daddy I can't imagine you ever thinking that way," Maddie whispered leaving the obviously unspoken "or Gilbert" to her own thoughts. She couldn't imagine Gilbert being like that. If he only wanted to sleep with her then he would have brought it up by now, but he hadn't.
"I know it's hard to believe," he said, a self deprecating smirk on his face, "but I know firsthand all the dirty little thoughts that go through a young man's head and I don't want you to get hurt because some boy is pressuring you to do something you don't want to do." He gave a tired sigh before wrapping his arms around her, pulling Maddie close and resting his cheek against her hair. "I'm only saying this because I love and I want to protect you."
Maddie returned the hug as she nodded into his shoulder. "I know," she whispered. "And I love you too."
Sunday
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I really do hope Gilbert behaves himself though.
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Thanks for commenting :)
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Thanks for commenting :)
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You're welcome!
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