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hetalia2009-05-03 10:18 pm
bloodynewmoon.livejournal.com) wrote in hetalia2009-05-03 10:18 pm
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[Fanfic] A Mad-lib Drabble
I hope it's okay, but I found a link to this at nation_ask and thought it'd be fun for people to fill out and share.
Here's mine:
The Battle For The Gun
In the sea, Russia kissed his gun. He had been busy with the gun for hours and now wanted nothing more than a golden cuddle or a pretty massage from his lover America.
He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his sweet America appeared at the door, grinning happily.
"Put down the gun," America said wonderfully. "Unless you want me to kiss that gun on your head."
Russia put down the gun. He was lovely. He had never seen America so wonderful before and it made him blue.
America picked up the gun, then withdrew a ball from his leg. "Don't be so lovely," America said with a wonderful grimace. "A fox bit my lip this morning, and everything became bright. Now with this gun and this ball I can wonderfully rule the world!"
Russia clutched his stupid lip vividly. This was his lover, his sweet America, now staring at him with a wonderful leg.
"Fight it!" Russia shouted. "The fox just wants the gun for his own sweet devices! He doesn't love you, not the golden way I do!"
Russia could see America trembling vividly. Russia reached out his head and touched America's leg wonderfully. He was sweet, so sweet, but he knew only his stupid love for America would break the fox's spell.
Sure enough, America dropped the gun with a thunk. "Oh, Russia," he squealed. "I'm so golden, can you ever forgive me?"
But Russia had already moved in the sea. Like a fish left out for three weeks, he pressed his head into America's leg. And as they fell together in a bright fit of love, the gun lay on the floor, blue and forgotten.
Here's mine:
The Battle For The Gun
In the sea, Russia kissed his gun. He had been busy with the gun for hours and now wanted nothing more than a golden cuddle or a pretty massage from his lover America.
He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his sweet America appeared at the door, grinning happily.
"Put down the gun," America said wonderfully. "Unless you want me to kiss that gun on your head."
Russia put down the gun. He was lovely. He had never seen America so wonderful before and it made him blue.
America picked up the gun, then withdrew a ball from his leg. "Don't be so lovely," America said with a wonderful grimace. "A fox bit my lip this morning, and everything became bright. Now with this gun and this ball I can wonderfully rule the world!"
Russia clutched his stupid lip vividly. This was his lover, his sweet America, now staring at him with a wonderful leg.
"Fight it!" Russia shouted. "The fox just wants the gun for his own sweet devices! He doesn't love you, not the golden way I do!"
Russia could see America trembling vividly. Russia reached out his head and touched America's leg wonderfully. He was sweet, so sweet, but he knew only his stupid love for America would break the fox's spell.
Sure enough, America dropped the gun with a thunk. "Oh, Russia," he squealed. "I'm so golden, can you ever forgive me?"
But Russia had already moved in the sea. Like a fish left out for three weeks, he pressed his head into America's leg. And as they fell together in a bright fit of love, the gun lay on the floor, blue and forgotten.
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The reason I love mad-libs right there.
This pretty much made my day xD
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Soviet Russia really sneaks up on you, I wasn't expecting it.
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Of course here, comfort appreciates me...
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So.... he took a BALL away from his LEG.... that's some serious skills right there, America!! (/mind in the gutter)
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Here's mine:
"Gilbert and Ludwig were out for a stupid Valentine's walk on a dick. As they went, Ludwig rested his hand on Gilbert's dick. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so neko, Gilbert was filled with sparkly dread.
"Do you suppose it's gay here?" he asked sexily.
"You kawaii silly," Ludwig said, tickling Gilbert with his iron cross. "It's completely fat."
Just then, a faggy german shepard leapt out from behind a dress and fucked Ludwig in the ass. "Aaargh!" Ludwig screamed.
Things looked faggy. But Gilbert, although he was QT-pie, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a face and, like a German trying to empty the taps of the entire beer hall, beat the german shepard huskily until it ran off. "That will teach you to fuck innocent people."
Then he clasped Ludwig close. Ludwig was bleeding gayly. "My darling," Gilbert said, and pressed his lips to Ludwig's cock.
"I love you," Ludwig said faggily, and expired in Gilbert's arms.
Gilbert never loved again."
I'M AWFUL
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1000 Mirror Eagles
Russia paced possessively back and forth. Cold dread filled his heart. America should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn't like him to be late. Oh, my cruel love, Russia thought. Where could you be?
Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. America had been taken hostage by Best Eye, a supervillain who had the city in a state of crimson terror. Russia fainted dead away, like a parasitic flame that burned out a candle of its wax tears.
When he came to, there was a bump on his mouth and the cold dread had returned. "America, my bloody honey bunny," he cried out quietly. "What is Best Eye doing to you?" Probably torturing him, laughing lovingly as he kissed him in the hair.
In the midst of all the terror and tears, Russia remembered a story his grandmother had told him. If you fold 1000 mirror eagles, then whatever you wish for will come true.
Russia ordered in a supply of mirror and set to work, folding eagles until his mouth was sore and he could hardly see. It took a week. He was just finishing up the very last eagle when America walked in the front door.
"America!" Russia screamed and threw himself into America's arms. "It worked! I folded 1000 mirror eagles and it brought you back to me." He was so happy, he felt like he was dancing beyond the horizon. He kissed America scarily on the hair.
"Actually," America said, pulling away fervently, "I was rescued by the White Pipe. He's a new superhero in town." America sighed. "And he's really silent."
The cold dread came back. "But you're distant to be back here with me, right?"
America checked his watch. "Sure. But I've got to go meet the White Pipe for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay lonely, baby." He left and the door banged behind him.
Russia choked back a sob and started folding another eagle. Then he went out and got drunk instead.
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I admit I totally love how mine turned out. ♥ Here it is.
The Unicorn Prince
Arthur was walking through a long meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around his head when he spied a sexy little unicorn lying under a tree.
Arthur skipped over to see the dear thing and was tall to find that he was hurt! A bottle had pierced his sweet little cheek and he whimpered deadly with the pain.
"My big little friend," Arthur said. "Let me help you!" He took out his Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the bottle, as incredibly as he could. The unicorn cried out and Arthur's heart ached, like a rainbow that casts a happy glow o'er all the land. "You'll be all right," Arthur whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Alfred and you can live with me forever!"
Scooping Alfred up in his arms, Arthur carried him home and made a bed for him beside his own. For seven days and seven nights, Arthur nursed Alfred, cleaning his cheek and feeding him Book-brand unicorn chow.
On the eighth night, Alfred climbed into bed with Arthur. He burrowed under the covers and slowly fucked Arthur's chest. It made Arthur giggle and he cuddled close to Alfred, stroking his hand and singing fully to him.
They continued that way for a long time. Every day, Arthur hurried home so he could curl up with Alfred. It gave him a friendly feeling whenever Alfred fucked his chest.
Then one night, Alfred looked up at Arthur and said, "If you kiss me, I will become an awesome prince."
Arthur screamed huskily, he was so surprised. How could an unicorn talk? He must have dropped off and dreamed it.
"You're not dreaming," Alfred said. "Kiss me."
"Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," Arthur said and kissed Alfred on his hand. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood an awesome prince! With a crown and everything!
"I'm Prince Alfred," he said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."
"Is it really you?" Arthur said.
"See?" Alfred said and showed Arthur the scar from the bottle on his cheek. Then he kissed Arthur and they tumbled on the floor and did a lot of very manly things, some of them involving a bright sword.
"I love you," Alfred said when they were done. Arthur clasped him close and they lived together happily ever after on all the prince treasure Alfred had stashed away.
And if Alfred didn't know about Arthur's visits to the unicorn sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt him.
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Oh god the image. XD
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The Red Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Russia and Alfred went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Russia hit Alfred in his neck with a big small iceball. It hurt a lot, but Russia kissed it greatfully and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really cold snow man!" Russia said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Alfred said. "That would be more white and politically correct."
"I know," Russia said. "We can make a snow cat. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."
So they rolled the snow up painfully and made a prickly snow cat. Russia put on a bed for the hair. The cat was almost as big as Alfred.
"It looks colorful," Russia said happilly. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Alfred said and held up a hot gun. "I found this on a chair." He put the gun onto the cat's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the cat, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like a stranded man at sea catches sight of a boat.
Alfred screamed mournfully and ran but the snow cat chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow cat leapt him huskily.
"Nobody does that to my little Lovely House," Russia screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow cat through the head. It fell down and Russia kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Alfred said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The gun lay in the yard until a big child picked it up and took it home.
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I love you for this line. Thank you.