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hetalia2009-11-13 01:00 pm
iroh-fancier.livejournal.com) wrote in hetalia2009-11-13 01:00 pm
Entry tags:
[List] Things Germany will Not Allow N. Italy to do at UN Meetings
I really hope people aren't sick of these lists yet ORZ.
Title: Things Germany Will Not Allow N. Italy to Do at UN Meetings
Author/Artist: Chaser/![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
iroh_fancier
Character(s) or Pairing(s): heavy on the Italy/Germany, a bunch of other Nations mentioned.
Rating: PG-13/T I guess, for a few sexual references. Nothing too explicit.
Warnings: Some mild sensuality.
Summary: What the title says!
Notes: Some of these are probably not that funny, because it's really hard to write 101 things a generally well-behaved Nation shouldn't do :p.
EDIT: Pagingvarda_ni! The answer to your PM is yes, please! And thank you! But I can't PM you back because of your LJ's privacy settings, and your journal doesn't have any entries where I can leave a comment :(
1. “PASTAAA!” is not an acceptable answer for my thoughts on global warming.
2. Or the global economic crisis.
3. Or nuclear disarmament.
4. Or international terrorism.
5. Or global poverty
6. Even if America keeps encouraging me to say it because he likes my spaghetti.
7. Or my thoughts on yaoi.
8. Especially if Hungary is asking.
9. I can’t try on Hungary’s dresses anymore.
10. Even though they’re really pretty.
11. And posing for her photographs is so much fun!
12. If Prussia says, “pull my finger,” the answer is “no.”
13. If he says I’m a “pussy,” I need to get Germany.
14. If Russia asks me to become one with him, I need to getan adult Germany.
15. If France tries to take Sicily again, I need to get Germany.
16. Crying when Korea says he invented pasta is an overreaction.
17. Even if noodles really did originate in China.
18. Ve? They did? G—G—Germanyyyyy!
19. Undressing and climbing up on the table for siesta if the meeting runs long is not allowed.
20. Especially because it makes Prussia, Hungary, Russia and France offer to take siestas with me. (I don’t know why this is a bad thing, though!).
21. I will make sure I put pants on before every meeting.
22. Even if wearing Germany’s is so much fun!
23. Saying that me, Germany, Japan, Bulgaria, Finland, Romania, Hungary, Thailand and everybody else I was friends with in the 1930s and 40s should have a big Reunion Party where we talk about all the fun we had camping and cooking pasta and singing songs is a really bad idea, and it will probably make Big Brother France, America, England, China and Russia hit me a lot.
24. Because Germany said so, and that I should think about why this might be before I ask any more questions!
25. I’m really sad now. ;_; I like parties.
26. Russia’s vodka isn’t like wine, and drinking a bottle is a really bad idea.
27. But vodka tastes yucky anyway, so that’s OK!
28. When Finland and Sweden bring their doggy and he starts rubbing up against Canada’s leg, I’m not allowed to talk about how Germany and I acted like doggies last night, and how I rubbed up against Germany’s **** just like that!
29. I’m also not allowed to say that Germany looks different from me down there.
30. Or that Germany’s really big down there, too.
31. Or that it feels good when Germany puts his big—
32. Ne, ne, Germany? Why are you banging your head against the desk like that?
33. If Prussia asks me if I like Germany’s wurst, I’m supposed to ignore him.
34. Even if Germany’s wurst really does taste like shit.
35. I don’t understand why this makes Germany yell!
36. Niccolo Machiavelli isn’t like Batman in The Dark Knight, no matter what America says.
37. The Pope isn’t my boss no matter what Vatican says.
38. White flags are not good Christmas gifts.
39. Even if I embroidered everybody’s name on them so they’re personalized.
40. I can not accept candy from Russia.
41. Poland and I can’t paint each other’s toenails.
42. Even when things get really boring and we don’t understand what’s going on.
43. Sneaking off to play Xbox with Sealand isn’t allowed.
44. Even if things are _really, really_ boring.
45. Especially if America joins in.
46. Glomping Latvia will probably mean we have to call paramedics.
47. Asking England if he was the Blue Fairy in _Pinocchio_ is a bad idea.
48. So is jumping on Finland’s lap and telling him that I want pasta for Christmas.
49. Because Sweden might take this the wrong way.
50. When France offers to let me sit on his lap for a “Christmas Surprise,” I should get Germany immediately.
51. We can not adjourn for lunch now.
52. Nobody wants to hear my songs about Germany.
53. Especially because they make Germany blush.
54. Staring at Ukraine’s chest is rude.
55. So is asking her if her boobies are squishy, like Romano’s!
56. If Romano hits me after this, I cannot come crying to Germany.
57. If Germany punches America after America calls the car we gave him for Christmas our “butt baby,” I should not try to separate them.
58. Tomatoes are not acceptable currency.
59. Even if they should be.
60. Painting moustaches on the portraits of former and current Secretaries-General is not a valid form of artistic expression.
61. Anything America suggests is a bad idea.
62. Anything Prussia suggests is a bad idea.
63. Anything France suggests is not only a bad idea, but one that will probably get me arrested.
64. Anything Russia suggests will probably hurt. And is also a bad idea.
65. Whole grain pasta is not heretical.
66. It is not OK to hit Prussia for telling me to try it.
67. Even if Germany says Prussia deserves to be hit regularly.
68. I should not repeat what Germany says in private about other nations.
69. Especially when what he says starts with “France is a filthy pervert.”
70. Because France will probably like this.
71. I should not talk about Germany’s “special photograph books” during meetings.
72. Especially the ones with pictures of ****.
73. Or pictures of ****.
74. Or pictures of me wearing doggy collars.
75. Leaving the meeting to chase Greece’s kitties is forbidden.
76. If I fall asleep during the meeting, Germany will wake me up with a slap on the head.
77. Or by throwing his glass of water on me.
78. Or by whispering, “Italy! You’re late for training!”
79. Germany, that’s mean!!!
80. When Russia says he wants to visit my sunny regions, it doesn’t mean what I think it means.
81. I should not kiss Japan on the cheek to say hello, or to show him that he’s one of my best friends.
82. Really, didn’t I learn anything from last time?
83. No, because I still don’t understand what “take responsibility” means!
84. Russia’s pipe is not a pasta strainer.
85. Danmark’s axe is not a pasta cutter.
86. England’s magic wand is not a pasta stirrer.
87. And that book he has with all the weird drawings and upside down stars all over it is definitely not a recipe book.
88. That thing with all the tentacles that came out of the pasta pot when I tried to use England’s weird book was not an octopus.
89. And I should not have brought it to the meeting as a gift for Japan to make sashimi out of.
90. The fact that it almost ate Sealand means we’re definitely not invited to England’s Christmas party this year.
91. Speaking of Sealand, I should not tell him stories about how Poland and I dreamed about being independent when we were his age.
92. And I should not have signed that petition he passed around during last meeting called “Recognize Sealand as Ruler of the Whole World, Including Jerk England!”
93. Even if he promised to give me pasta.
94. A silly accident on my part (dropping my lap top in the pasta pot the night before my G8 presentation) does not constitute an emergency on Estonia’s part.
95. I should not try to correct America when he asks if all Italians speak like this: “A bibbity boobity ba” or if we all say “fuggidaboutit!”
96. Because gangster movies aren’t real.
97. And because America also thinks that aliens talk to him.
98. The meeting hall does not need a gelato cart.
99. Germany can’t spend all of his time running around after me making sure that I’m OK.
100. Even though I know he really likes doing it.
101. I can not have pasta now.
Title: Things Germany Will Not Allow N. Italy to Do at UN Meetings
Author/Artist: Chaser/
iroh_fancierCharacter(s) or Pairing(s): heavy on the Italy/Germany, a bunch of other Nations mentioned.
Rating: PG-13/T I guess, for a few sexual references. Nothing too explicit.
Warnings: Some mild sensuality.
Summary: What the title says!
Notes: Some of these are probably not that funny, because it's really hard to write 101 things a generally well-behaved Nation shouldn't do :p.
EDIT: Paging
varda_ni! The answer to your PM is yes, please! And thank you! But I can't PM you back because of your LJ's privacy settings, and your journal doesn't have any entries where I can leave a comment :(1. “PASTAAA!” is not an acceptable answer for my thoughts on global warming.
2. Or the global economic crisis.
3. Or nuclear disarmament.
4. Or international terrorism.
5. Or global poverty
6. Even if America keeps encouraging me to say it because he likes my spaghetti.
7. Or my thoughts on yaoi.
8. Especially if Hungary is asking.
9. I can’t try on Hungary’s dresses anymore.
10. Even though they’re really pretty.
11. And posing for her photographs is so much fun!
12. If Prussia says, “pull my finger,” the answer is “no.”
13. If he says I’m a “pussy,” I need to get Germany.
14. If Russia asks me to become one with him, I need to get
15. If France tries to take Sicily again, I need to get Germany.
16. Crying when Korea says he invented pasta is an overreaction.
17. Even if noodles really did originate in China.
18. Ve? They did? G—G—Germanyyyyy!
19. Undressing and climbing up on the table for siesta if the meeting runs long is not allowed.
20. Especially because it makes Prussia, Hungary, Russia and France offer to take siestas with me. (I don’t know why this is a bad thing, though!).
21. I will make sure I put pants on before every meeting.
22. Even if wearing Germany’s is so much fun!
23. Saying that me, Germany, Japan, Bulgaria, Finland, Romania, Hungary, Thailand and everybody else I was friends with in the 1930s and 40s should have a big Reunion Party where we talk about all the fun we had camping and cooking pasta and singing songs is a really bad idea, and it will probably make Big Brother France, America, England, China and Russia hit me a lot.
24. Because Germany said so, and that I should think about why this might be before I ask any more questions!
25. I’m really sad now. ;_; I like parties.
26. Russia’s vodka isn’t like wine, and drinking a bottle is a really bad idea.
27. But vodka tastes yucky anyway, so that’s OK!
28. When Finland and Sweden bring their doggy and he starts rubbing up against Canada’s leg, I’m not allowed to talk about how Germany and I acted like doggies last night, and how I rubbed up against Germany’s **** just like that!
29. I’m also not allowed to say that Germany looks different from me down there.
30. Or that Germany’s really big down there, too.
31. Or that it feels good when Germany puts his big—
32. Ne, ne, Germany? Why are you banging your head against the desk like that?
33. If Prussia asks me if I like Germany’s wurst, I’m supposed to ignore him.
34. Even if Germany’s wurst really does taste like shit.
35. I don’t understand why this makes Germany yell!
36. Niccolo Machiavelli isn’t like Batman in The Dark Knight, no matter what America says.
37. The Pope isn’t my boss no matter what Vatican says.
38. White flags are not good Christmas gifts.
39. Even if I embroidered everybody’s name on them so they’re personalized.
40. I can not accept candy from Russia.
41. Poland and I can’t paint each other’s toenails.
42. Even when things get really boring and we don’t understand what’s going on.
43. Sneaking off to play Xbox with Sealand isn’t allowed.
44. Even if things are _really, really_ boring.
45. Especially if America joins in.
46. Glomping Latvia will probably mean we have to call paramedics.
47. Asking England if he was the Blue Fairy in _Pinocchio_ is a bad idea.
48. So is jumping on Finland’s lap and telling him that I want pasta for Christmas.
49. Because Sweden might take this the wrong way.
50. When France offers to let me sit on his lap for a “Christmas Surprise,” I should get Germany immediately.
51. We can not adjourn for lunch now.
52. Nobody wants to hear my songs about Germany.
53. Especially because they make Germany blush.
54. Staring at Ukraine’s chest is rude.
55. So is asking her if her boobies are squishy, like Romano’s!
56. If Romano hits me after this, I cannot come crying to Germany.
57. If Germany punches America after America calls the car we gave him for Christmas our “butt baby,” I should not try to separate them.
58. Tomatoes are not acceptable currency.
59. Even if they should be.
60. Painting moustaches on the portraits of former and current Secretaries-General is not a valid form of artistic expression.
61. Anything America suggests is a bad idea.
62. Anything Prussia suggests is a bad idea.
63. Anything France suggests is not only a bad idea, but one that will probably get me arrested.
64. Anything Russia suggests will probably hurt. And is also a bad idea.
65. Whole grain pasta is not heretical.
66. It is not OK to hit Prussia for telling me to try it.
67. Even if Germany says Prussia deserves to be hit regularly.
68. I should not repeat what Germany says in private about other nations.
69. Especially when what he says starts with “France is a filthy pervert.”
70. Because France will probably like this.
71. I should not talk about Germany’s “special photograph books” during meetings.
72. Especially the ones with pictures of ****.
73. Or pictures of ****.
74. Or pictures of me wearing doggy collars.
75. Leaving the meeting to chase Greece’s kitties is forbidden.
76. If I fall asleep during the meeting, Germany will wake me up with a slap on the head.
77. Or by throwing his glass of water on me.
78. Or by whispering, “Italy! You’re late for training!”
79. Germany, that’s mean!!!
80. When Russia says he wants to visit my sunny regions, it doesn’t mean what I think it means.
81. I should not kiss Japan on the cheek to say hello, or to show him that he’s one of my best friends.
82. Really, didn’t I learn anything from last time?
83. No, because I still don’t understand what “take responsibility” means!
84. Russia’s pipe is not a pasta strainer.
85. Danmark’s axe is not a pasta cutter.
86. England’s magic wand is not a pasta stirrer.
87. And that book he has with all the weird drawings and upside down stars all over it is definitely not a recipe book.
88. That thing with all the tentacles that came out of the pasta pot when I tried to use England’s weird book was not an octopus.
89. And I should not have brought it to the meeting as a gift for Japan to make sashimi out of.
90. The fact that it almost ate Sealand means we’re definitely not invited to England’s Christmas party this year.
91. Speaking of Sealand, I should not tell him stories about how Poland and I dreamed about being independent when we were his age.
92. And I should not have signed that petition he passed around during last meeting called “Recognize Sealand as Ruler of the Whole World, Including Jerk England!”
93. Even if he promised to give me pasta.
94. A silly accident on my part (dropping my lap top in the pasta pot the night before my G8 presentation) does not constitute an emergency on Estonia’s part.
95. I should not try to correct America when he asks if all Italians speak like this: “A bibbity boobity ba” or if we all say “fuggidaboutit!”
96. Because gangster movies aren’t real.
97. And because America also thinks that aliens talk to him.
98. The meeting hall does not need a gelato cart.
99. Germany can’t spend all of his time running around after me making sure that I’m OK.
100. Even though I know he really likes doing it.
101. I can not have pasta now.
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#41, #46, and #91 were extra hilarious because of my wonderful cosplay adventures with my friends...XDD''Great list :DDDDDD
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ohmygod.
/dead
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These are really funny, I like the idea of tomatoes as currency, lol
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OMG I DIEDDD
Especially 72-74!
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I don't think anyone can get tired of these.
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Awww... Ita-chan can party at my house anytime. orz
88. That thing with all the tentacles that came out of the pasta pot when I tried to use England’s weird book was not an octopus.
I don't even wanna know what that was.. O__O
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Still this is pretty funny
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And possibly on being American :p). Would this also be acceptable? Sicily's just so far south that I think it would be more Romano's concern.no subject
Lol As I read this part I had a de ja vous
23. Saying that me, Germany, Japan, Bulgaria, Finland, Romania, Hungary, Thailand and everybody else I was friends with in the 1930s and 40s should have a big Reunion Party where we talk about all the fun we had camping and cooking pasta and singing songs is a really bad idea, and it will probably make Big Brother France, America, England, China and Russia hit me a lot.
I don't understand 23 I wish to understand though >A
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I want those ;O;''
And I laughed so hard xD'
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-getshot-
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12. If Prussia says, “pull my finger,” the answer is “no.”
I cant stop seeing that in my head.
71-74... I wanna see those special photograph books. XD
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"A bibbity boobity ba" xD
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Late reply is late
Go ahead! (And no need to apologise. That's okay. It can happen to everyone.)
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OMG >W< Can Italy be more cute >W<
= =+ Ita-chan, I will be more than happy to record your doggie style experience with Germany ( and secretly sell it to Hungary or Japan {EVIL LAUHG})
BTW, I object to " Not wear dress and pose for Hungary"
Germany = =... don't keep Italy all to yourself. the fan needs some love too (Get PIA by Potato..)